If there is one thing I would consider myself seasoned at as a mother, it's traveling. As a military family, I have made international trips with my son just the two of us, we have moved internationally with him and while I was pregnant with our daughter (we just didn't know it yet), have been on many 10+ hour car trips in Europe and in the States, and have packed, and packed, and packed again for little people ages five months to three years. So, as we were preparing to go to Wyoming to visit family for the holidays, I thought I had it in the bag when it comes to traveling with kids. I mean, I did a plane ride from Germany to the US with a 5 mo. old baby and back again with a 9 mo. old baby, what can't I handle (in the traveling realm). I know what you're thinking; "how does she do it?!" Well, here are my five easy steps for traveling with small people under the age of four.
1. Pack Enough Diapers to Last Through a Nuclear Holocaust.
Then pack 1 more bag just in case. Because it never fails. It seems like my kids mess/wet their pants exponentially more when traveling in the car than any other time. I guess it's good to know they are staying hydrated, but seriously! I rolled into the driveway of my parents house with 1 fresh diaper to spare, praying my daughter wasn't considering making a #2 for a couple hours. She obliged, thank God.
2. Pack Ample Snacks
This way, your toddler can decide he hates everything in the snack bag so he can frequent convenience stores along the route to buy more foods he is going to hate upon opening the packages. Apparently gummy bears and granola bars and goldfish crackers obtain an unbearable taste when riding in the car. So do mini doughnuts, fruit snacks, and cheese sticks. All of these items will become inedible once the car starts and the only thing that is fit for human consumption are suckers. Thanks to grandpa, suckers happened.
3. Choose your Restaurants Wisely!
Kids need some time out of the car on long trips regardless of their age. However, this doesn't mean that I want to spend 19 hours in a McDonald's Play Place. Don't get me wrong, I am beyond thankful for the McDonald's Play Places, especially those with wifi, as a great indoor alternative to the park or if I must get some work done in a safe environment like our local McDonald's. When driving, this is the worst possible option. We avoid anything with a play place like the plague. However, there are still some awesome options for kids to eat! Places with quick service and a kids menu are always a hit. Really, any place that serves fries and chocolate milk in a timely manner and has a happy hour (when I have a co-pilot) is good by me. I highly recommend Applebee's and Waffle House for kids dining options on the road.
4. A Fun Activity Bag
Have your child pack the special activity bag with toys, books, etc to do in the car so he can beg to play a game on the Kindle Fire or your cell phone the whole time. I let him play on the Kindle to keep both of our sanity, and asking him to just "check out the scenary" for 12 hours in one day is a lot to ask of a three year old. But, we still choose to limit the time he uses these electronics so he doesn't turn into a little demon tablet addict. So, I give the device about 10% and then when it "runned out of batteries" that's the time when we stop and mom plugs it in to charge up to another 10%. It's been an easy and usually fit-free method in my experience thus far. Oh, that bag of cars, books, tractors, and other toys? It's still zipped shut in his temporary bedroom as we visit family. This bag is a perfect way to take up the last 4 inches of trunk space in the vehicle to make sure you are really getting your space worth out of that car!
5. Download Expedia and Hotels.com
Do this so that next time you can say screw it to the road trip and just fly there. However, on the road these apps come in handy to book a hotel along the route! The last thing I want to do when the little people are just done being in the car is drive around looking for a hotel with vacancy. Booking on these sites is quick and easy and can be done in route (not while driving, of course!). Anything that saves me some time, saves my kids some tears, and makes our hotel stay experience less like we are going to get mugged and more like we are super fancy patrons is something I will do! But seriously. Next time, just fly.
Road tripping is one of those things we all want to do in our college and younger years. If you do it then, awesome! Let me just say if you wait to do your road tripping until you have children be prepared for things like poop, spilled candy, begging to stop at truck stops, asking "are we there yet?", complaining about the music (although, I can't blame him, my co-pilot's choice of station, Willy's Roadhouse, isn't exactly the most hip station on Sirius), and stopping much more frequently than without children will happen with small ones along. I am lucky in that my little people are actually very good travelers. Part of the perks of a military family is that you do travel often whether it is to move or visit family far away, and everything is far away from Wyoming, so they have started their road tripping at a young age. My best advice? Take it in stride and don't sweat the small stuff! Do what makes the trip easiest on you, even if it means your toddler eats blow pops for lunch.
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
Thursday, November 10, 2016
Real Life as a Veteran's Wife
Tomorrow, Friday November 11, 2016 is Veteran's Day. Before I was married, I looked forward to all of the Veteran's Day sales to build my winter wardrobe! It was a day for an assembly where I was thankful for my grandpa's service to our country. I always thought my grandpa's service in WWII would be the extent of my military experience.
Life is different now.
In 2012, I met the funniest, sweetest, hardest working, most amazing man in the world. We met at his family branding as we were invited since my dad had just employed his uncle. So, we went to ride and brand calves and that would be that. I never thought that my life would change forever from that day forward, but it did in the best of ways. After we began talking, I learned that that guy who had caught my eye during the branding was a staff sergeant in in the United States army. We got married in December of 2012 and we have been on this wonderful ride every since!
But sometimes there is darkness. People who don't know often glorify the veteran's wife. People think my life is similar to the hit TV show "Army Wives." It isn't. I mean base housing is definitely not mansions, guys. It is not glamorous. The truth is, it can be very hard. The scars left on the hearts of combat veterans cut deep.
My husband is a combat engineer. He has experienced loss in ways I cannot even begin to fathom. Sometimes I am sad and frustrated I was not there during the times of deployment. He has fought for our beautiful country in the Middle East multiple times and he has come home every time. He has overcome so many things that I can't even imagine or begin to imagine. Sometimes it's hard that I wasn't there. Sometimes I wish I had been there for him. Sometimes I wish our paths had crossed sooner. Then, sometimes I don't.
There are demons for those who experience war. I have never experienced anything even remotely close to the things my husband has, and for that, it is undisputed that he is the strongest person I know. I was not there then. I was not there when he left or when he came home. Ok, so I was in middle and high school, but time like is irrelevant. The fact is, I can't change that. But, I am here now. I am here for the bad dreams and the bad days. I have learned what days are going to be harder than others. I know the dates. I don't know the stories and I don't need to. What I need to be is here and supportive and I pray everyday that I am enough of a rock and support system for him.
Have you ever looked up the rates of suicide in veterans? It's mind blowing. In the military world, it's a dark shadow that's all around us. Not that my husband is suicidal, but when it is all around you, it can be a real worry on those down days. The days that the nightmares are real, the days that the memories come flooding in. The days that I just want to hold him close, but I know he needs his space. Those are the days that are hard because I wasn't there. I don't know the stories. I don't know what happened. I don't know the friends and brothers who stood beside him. I know snippets. I know what he feels comfortable sharing and that is all I want to know.
There's a lot of wives out there like me. Whether your husband is still active duty or a veteran when you met, you know how it feels. You know what it;s like to come after the darkness. You about the dreams and the sadness. The loss and the emotions we see our husbands experience periodically. I know while the self I was before I was married would be shopping the sales tomorrow, the self I am now will be thanking God tomorrow that this soldier is mine. That he has always come home and for every sacrifice he has made for his country. I know someone will say a thank you to me for the sacrifices I have made, but the truth is I don't deserve it. I don't deserve nor want a thank you. I don't want praise for falling in love. I don't want praise for marrying a man in the military. I don't want praise for the sacrifices I have made because compared to his they are so minuscule. I don't want thanks for loving the person I was put on this earth to love. Thank him. Thank every person you know who has served or is serving in the armed forces. Show compassion to the wives and mothers and husbands and fathers who will never be able to hug their loved one again. But please, don't thank me. I am not worthy of being equated the same honor that my husband is so very, very worth of. Thank the soldiers we can do things like vote, like speak our minds, like own firearms, like own and operate our own businesses no matter what it may be, like live in this beautiful and free country.
Being the wife of a veteran who has seen many wars is not easy, but it is also not thankless. I see the thanks in him every single day. I see the thanks in the love he has for the children I was blessed to give him. I see the thanks in his content for home cooked meals and choice of television show. I see his thanks in clean and folded laundry. I see his thanks in the unconditional love he gives me. Thank a veteran on Veteran's Day. Shake their hand, hug them! Give them the thanks they are due. Let them know what they have provided for our country, for us, is not gone by without notice. They all deserve it.
Life is different now.
In 2012, I met the funniest, sweetest, hardest working, most amazing man in the world. We met at his family branding as we were invited since my dad had just employed his uncle. So, we went to ride and brand calves and that would be that. I never thought that my life would change forever from that day forward, but it did in the best of ways. After we began talking, I learned that that guy who had caught my eye during the branding was a staff sergeant in in the United States army. We got married in December of 2012 and we have been on this wonderful ride every since!
But sometimes there is darkness. People who don't know often glorify the veteran's wife. People think my life is similar to the hit TV show "Army Wives." It isn't. I mean base housing is definitely not mansions, guys. It is not glamorous. The truth is, it can be very hard. The scars left on the hearts of combat veterans cut deep.
My husband is a combat engineer. He has experienced loss in ways I cannot even begin to fathom. Sometimes I am sad and frustrated I was not there during the times of deployment. He has fought for our beautiful country in the Middle East multiple times and he has come home every time. He has overcome so many things that I can't even imagine or begin to imagine. Sometimes it's hard that I wasn't there. Sometimes I wish I had been there for him. Sometimes I wish our paths had crossed sooner. Then, sometimes I don't.
There are demons for those who experience war. I have never experienced anything even remotely close to the things my husband has, and for that, it is undisputed that he is the strongest person I know. I was not there then. I was not there when he left or when he came home. Ok, so I was in middle and high school, but time like is irrelevant. The fact is, I can't change that. But, I am here now. I am here for the bad dreams and the bad days. I have learned what days are going to be harder than others. I know the dates. I don't know the stories and I don't need to. What I need to be is here and supportive and I pray everyday that I am enough of a rock and support system for him.
Have you ever looked up the rates of suicide in veterans? It's mind blowing. In the military world, it's a dark shadow that's all around us. Not that my husband is suicidal, but when it is all around you, it can be a real worry on those down days. The days that the nightmares are real, the days that the memories come flooding in. The days that I just want to hold him close, but I know he needs his space. Those are the days that are hard because I wasn't there. I don't know the stories. I don't know what happened. I don't know the friends and brothers who stood beside him. I know snippets. I know what he feels comfortable sharing and that is all I want to know.
There's a lot of wives out there like me. Whether your husband is still active duty or a veteran when you met, you know how it feels. You know what it;s like to come after the darkness. You about the dreams and the sadness. The loss and the emotions we see our husbands experience periodically. I know while the self I was before I was married would be shopping the sales tomorrow, the self I am now will be thanking God tomorrow that this soldier is mine. That he has always come home and for every sacrifice he has made for his country. I know someone will say a thank you to me for the sacrifices I have made, but the truth is I don't deserve it. I don't deserve nor want a thank you. I don't want praise for falling in love. I don't want praise for marrying a man in the military. I don't want praise for the sacrifices I have made because compared to his they are so minuscule. I don't want thanks for loving the person I was put on this earth to love. Thank him. Thank every person you know who has served or is serving in the armed forces. Show compassion to the wives and mothers and husbands and fathers who will never be able to hug their loved one again. But please, don't thank me. I am not worthy of being equated the same honor that my husband is so very, very worth of. Thank the soldiers we can do things like vote, like speak our minds, like own firearms, like own and operate our own businesses no matter what it may be, like live in this beautiful and free country.
Being the wife of a veteran who has seen many wars is not easy, but it is also not thankless. I see the thanks in him every single day. I see the thanks in the love he has for the children I was blessed to give him. I see the thanks in his content for home cooked meals and choice of television show. I see his thanks in clean and folded laundry. I see his thanks in the unconditional love he gives me. Thank a veteran on Veteran's Day. Shake their hand, hug them! Give them the thanks they are due. Let them know what they have provided for our country, for us, is not gone by without notice. They all deserve it.
Friday, November 4, 2016
Jimmy Kimmel ain't got Nothin' on Me!
Lately, I have seen lots of posts of people telling their kids they ate all of their Halloween candy as instructed by Jimmy Kimmel. This is apparently something that has happened for a year or two, but it's my son's first Halloween where he actually went around and trick-or-treated. I did the honors of staying home with the baby and handing out candy to our handful of trick-or-treaters that rang our doorbell. But, telling my son I ate all of his candy would mean relatively nothing to him. First of all, he wouldn't believe me. Secondly, even if he did, he would probably just move on with life because he really doesn't like it that much.
Except Suckers.
Of ALL the candy in the world, he has to be in love with the stickiest, grossest, drooliest, biggest choking hazard candy known to man. I find countless sucker sticks all over our house. Somewhere this kid has a stash; he just has to to have this many sucker sticks. The stickiness makes him perpetually dirty and sticky. He is always drooling sticky, sucker drool. But that's not the worst. The worst is when I find a red sucker stuck to my nearly white carpet, that's the worst. So, what did I do when there were millions of suckers from the various Halloween parties, birthdays, and trunk or treats before the big night?
I filled our candy bowl with candies from other parties. That's right, the second he stepped out the door with his dad to hid the streets I filled up our candy bowl with every last piece of candy in this house. Mostly suckers. I used my son's Halloween candy as our communal Halloween candy. Know what? I am not ashamed. This did two big things for us; 1) we didn't buy a single bag of candy so we saved money and 2) less candy for the toddler. My son is not a big fan of candy anyway. Many kinds he is unable to eat and he doesn't like chocolate unless it's ice cream or a small amount of frosting on a donut (but ONLY with sprinkles). Besides, it's not like he wasn't headed out to get even more candy anyway.
The best part is he didn't even notice. He didn't even care. He had his dum-dum mystery sucker and hit the hay. I took my candy tax out of the new stuff and his dad ate anything with peanuts in it and that was that. Why did I recycle my son's Halloween candy?! What kind of mother just takes the candy from their child and gives it to other kids?! This kind, that's who. I recycled the candy because he didn't need that much. I recycled it for the kids who came to our door instead of throwing it in the trash can. I recycled it because I like to save money. As long as it was not expired or looked questionable it went right into my red bowl.
So, Sorry, Jimmy. Sorry my kid doesn't care about your challenge and sorry that "candy recycle mom" is kind of cooler than your "ha ha I ate it all! Just kidding!" I enjoy seeing the kids faces light up getting some candy at my door, and, on the off chance my son would have cared, I would have showed up on your doorstep for you to end the tantrum that was occurring. Don't worry, I am not a creeper I have no idea where you live, Jimmy. Yea, I still love your show. No, I won't tell my kiddos I ate their candy--they won't ever believe me anyway because I am a terrible liar. Yea, I'm the candy recycle mom. And I really, really, rock at it!
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