"Oh! When are you due?!" uhmmm...NEVER.

It happened.  Someone asked me when I am due.  This has never happened to me before.  But, it happened.  I can join the ranks of all the moms who have had to say "nope, just fat thanks!"  But honestly, surprisingly really, it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would.

Let me back track a second and set the scene.  So we took our son to the pumpkin patch on Saturday and while having fun, we happened to run into a woman my husband used to work with at a previous duty station.  This was back when we were in our long-distance relationship, so she had not met me before and knew my husband as that grumpy bachelor who just really liked his beer (the man I fell madly in love with).  She was visiting with us, and said "I can't imagine you with three children!" while making the "bump" gesture. It was very nice and cute and friendly, but there is one problem; I'm not pregnant.

Since the birth of my son I have struggled with weight issues.  I gained WAY too much during my first pregnancy thanks to all of the delicious pastries that Germany has to offer.  So, this is a scenario I have been mortified about since his birth nearly three years ago.  I figured that if this ever happened I would cry.  I would have some snarky, bitchy comeback.  I would just walk away in shame.  None of that happened.  It's probably due to maturity, but when you are in the situation you realize some things.  The biggest thing is that people really want to be happy for pregnant women, and they really aren't trying to hurt feelings.

I laughed.  My husband just said "no... do you think my wife is just fat?"  She was so mortified.  I actually felt worse for her than me.  After she apologized and I assured her it was no biggie, I thought about the encounter.  Do I look pregnant?  Am I "fat?"  It took me aback for sure, but you know what it didn't do? It didn't hurt my feelings.  It surprisingly didn't hurt my feelings!  You know why?  Because she didn't know.

She didn't know that I have struggled with no longer being a size 5.  She didn't know my baby is only barely 4 months old.  She didn't know I had issues gaining a healthy amount with my daughter because I was afraid to gain too much.  She is newly pregnant herself, so was not aware that some moms just carry their weight in an awkward place (this would be me!).   She didn't know that I have worked my butt off to loose 22 lbs since the birth of my daughter in June.  Most importantly she wasn't out to hurt me.  Truth is, she probably really wanted another woman who she felt that she could connect with on pregnancy.

I just remind myself of the goals I have and the ones I have met. Guess what?  Instead of letting it get to me, I just am proud.  I'm proud of the mom body I have because it was able to grow and house two healthy, beautiful babies.  It means I was able to carry children, which is something many women are not able to do.  It will keep my on track with my body goals.  Will I be a size 5 again? Realistically no.  Will I get rid of the baby pooch? Realistically, in time.  I mean, my daughter is 4 months old!  I am shocked with the results I have seen so far (Zumba is no joke, guys).

Just don't let the "when are you dues" or "how far alongs" or "you look great pregnant!s" get to you.  I like to believe that 99% of the population really wants to compliment the pregnant form and help women feel confident.  Don't let it stop your goals, don't let it get to you, don't let it take away from every change your body has endured while making, having, and after children.  Women's bodies do some pretty amazing (and pretty freakin gross) stuff!  Be thankful to be a mom and to have beautiful children to show for it.  If you have a little extra and you are trying to get rid of it like me, remind yourself you will get there! Just keep working.  It's just one person.  It's just one person's view.  Remember, we all look chubby when we accidentally have our phone on selfie mode.