"See you Later," Never "Goodbye"

Sometimes I find myself complaining about military spouse life.  TriCare can be a headache, time away from my husband can be annoying, and if I wash another damn pen that was left in one of the bajillion pockets I happened to miss in the uniform, I may go insane!  But, all of these small annoyances are trivial in comparison to the part of military life that actually does stink; when our friends move away.

As military spouses, we tend to jump headfirst into friendships because we know we may only have a few months in any given location.  Thinking about it outside a military sense, yes, it does seem weird to just go to a person's house you have never met in person before!  I think the only ones who do that outside of military life use something called Tinder and it is for a totally different kind of "playdate," if you get my drift. I am not saying do not be safe, ALWAYS exercise caution and follow your gut, but when you know you have a good egg, don't waste anytime.  So naturally, when you invest so much time into new friends, who quickly become best friends, whose children quickly become your children's best friends, it hurts when someone must move on.

I never say goodbye.  This sprouted from my dad, and he likely didn't know that he was preparing me for a troubadouristic (ok, with much less music and singing) lifestyle, but he always says "see you later."  It didn't matter if he was talking to me before dropping me at school or talking to a gas station attendant in New Mexico he would likely never see again, he always just gives a good "see ya later." It's easier than goodbye.  It's especially easier to tell our friends we will see them later than to say goodbye.  Goodbyes are so final, and something that is not final is our friendship.  Whether it is to another country or across this one, distance doesn't end friends.  Facebook makes sure of that!  Not to mention the fact that the army is a (relatively) small world and we may well see each other later!

Goodbye is too definite, too concrete, too sobering.  As my children begin to realize they must eventually say their see you later's to their friends (especially my son who frequently asks me when Charlie, Jacob, and Paul will be coming to see him) I want them to know that they don't lose friends.  We can always be friends.  They can always be friends and they may see each other again in the future. They play and have fun and live in the now which is such a beautiful thing in such a transient life.  We can all learn a little bit from that.  So, when our days are running short, we play, we have fun, and we live in the now just as our children do.

                "Until we meet again, whether at our next post or at the gates of Heaven."